Before I married, my ex and I attended several weeks of pre-martial counseling with the pastor who married us. It was the pastor's suggestion. I am so grateful that we did the counseling and completed the course before we married. It makes you communicate all areas of your future life.
It helps you to talk about all aspects of marriage. You may be living together and thinking you have already worked things out. Marriage changes people. It is not the same as living with the person. There is a difference between living in a committed relationship with a person and living in a committed marriage with the person. You just have to experience. Believe me I have done both.
I can't stress this enough. Take action today. Find a church or organization to get pre-martial counseling. Stop stressing about the wedding, the ring , the honeymoon and all those other details. Set up a plan for regular martial counseling. I suggest doing it before you get married and every five years. Counseling helps you with setting a foundation for a successful marriage. This is more important that the engagement ring or any other wedding plans.
Mom's advice for today is to call and make an appointment for pre-marital counseling!
Mom's advice for today is to call and make an appointment for pre-marital counseling!
Mom's advice for today is to call and make an appointment for pre-marital counseling!
Did you do it yet? You could call now.
Mom's advice for today is to call and make an appointment for pre-marital counseling!
Mom's advice for today is to call and make an appointment for pre-marital counseling!
Mom's advice for today is to call and make an appointment for pre-marital counseling!
Enough said!
Now back to the all important engagement ring; to a woman absolutely yes the size of the wedding ring matters. You can create, have, or do whatever you want to have; with that said you can create having a beautiful engagement ring.
Let me share my experience with the marriage proposal and the engagement ring.
We are living together in an apartment together in Chicago. I am pregnant. My birthday is approaching. My ex-husband's cousin tells me that is going to propose. She is helping him to shop for the ring. Big mistake. The cousin was shopping for her dream engagement ring not mine. I was not happy with the ring. Please make sure to tell him what you want in a ring. I made a mistake in not telling her what I wanted or him for that matter.
So on my birthday, he makes a special dinner for me. After dinner, he got down and one knee. He asked me to marry him with engagement ring in hand. I said yes. I loved the whole proposal part, but the ring was a disappointment. It was too small. You really couldn't see it. I knew his bank account at the time and he had more money that.
An engagement ring to a woman means the expression of your love for her. Now it is okay to give her your grandma's ring until you get the real thing. Family heirlooms are nice, but a woman wants her own expression of love from you. A nice size engagement ring means to other women that he values you highly.
When Kobe cheated on his wife, then she requested that he pay for his indiscretion by buying her a four million dollar diamond. She is no fool. He may have publicly disrespected her with his cheating but she told the world this is my value to him. This puts the other women on alert.
My man may cheat with you for a minute, a month but he values me highly.
According to Steve Harvey's "Act Like A Lady Think Like A Man", a man looks at woman then wonders what is it going to cost to get sex from her. A man looks at a woman to see if he can afford her. He decides when he first meets her if he wants her for sport fishing or for marrying. He wants the cookie. If this is the way it is with men, then women have to put a value on their cookie. Women do that with the engagement ring.
Value your cookie like gold. Not only do men want your cookie but they want it exclusively. They want to know all the children are theirs. They want it to be loyal and faithful. They want it at home with the kids or just at home. They want you to adore them.
Once you put a value on your cookie, then you fall in love with a man. You may have to decide how you are willing to compromise with the value of the engagement ring. I am not suggesting that your man go broke over buying the ring of your dreams. Don't expect a million dollar ring from a blue-collar man or middle-class man.
Don't let a man tell you that you are not worth it either.
One of my daughters shared with me that she wanted a three diamond engagement ring; one diamond for the past, one diamond for the present, and one diamond for the future. I love that ideal. It is very romantic.
It is also very practical. You never know when you may have to sell the diamond of the future to provide for yourself or your family.
My mother advised me to keep an a separate savings account on the side. This is an account for you to have options. If you decide to tell Prince Charming that if he cheats on you, that you will leave him. You will need money to do this. In case you need to leave and go to a hotel or get an apartment one day.
My mother also advised me to know where his money is going, the property he buys, the investments he makes. You make sure that your name is on everything. My mother was married twice. I did not listen to her. I thought that my love with my ex was different. How naive I was at the time. I was mid-twenties and judging her. I thought to my self those are your mistakes and failures. My marriage is going to be different. We are in love.
This is my personal opinion. Some women don't care about the size of the ring. I do. Some women love jewelry. Some don't. For my second marriage I am creating a beautiful engagement. I am also going to tell him what I want this time.
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Indeed, a ring symbolizes your never-ending love for your partner. And it really doesn't matter how cheap or expensive your engagement ring is as long as it really comes from your heart and you truly love the one whom you want to give that ring.
My husband proposed to me six months ago. I was really surprised because I never thought that I was the one he would want to spend with for the rest of his life. The ring that he gave to me were actually from Indianapolis jewelers. It was really simple but it was beautiful and elegant. A jeweler (Indianapolis area) actually chose that ring because it's the most beautiful ring in their shop. And it was really perfect. We are getting married next month actually. Wish us luck!
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